Mantastic 2008 featuring Don Cheadle & The Funky Presidents: Friday, February 15, 2008

'Sup, Fool?

People, people! Welcome to Mantastic 2008, featuring yours truly, Don Cheadle, and the Funky Presidents. We've got Van Buren in the house, we've got Taft...hell, we even got Colonel Sanders. He ain't even a President, but we got him anyway.

Here's the deal, folks. We are the employees of a visual effects studio where we like to tap the bottle and tip it back. We're growing facial hair and it's a contest that goes for one month. Middle of January through middle of February. One month devoted to the dopest styles in history. You'll be shaving it all off for your ladies just in time to get some sweet lovin' on Valentine's Day.

Amen, brother.

Friday, February 15, 2008

The Sad Tale Of Will Groebe

Hello everyone.

It's your old pal Will here. I made it back to work today just after the lunchtime check-in. I've been out over a week in solitary confinement. Last Wednesday, as you all know, I was launched from my motorcycle by some asshole in a hurry.

Word of advice- If you hit a motorcyclist, or cause an accident involving a motorcyclist, hang up your phone, stop your goddamn car, and see if the guy's OK. He's probably hurting.

Anyways, so I've been laid out in pain for the past week. My excitement over being able to kick back and enjoy my recuperation time was hampered by the fact that I found out that Percocet makes me want to fucking puke. So I resorted to drinking alcohol to numb the pain, which can also cause vomiting, but I know my tolerance level.

So I'm sitting around in pain and drunk, and my kid gets the flu. Yay! Thank you. Did I mention I'm not getting laid with my Colonel?

Now somewhere over this time at home I must have hit my crazy limit, because on Monday I walked right into my bathroom and shaved myself to a baby's-butt freshface. I only had two days to go! What was I thinking?

It was a moment of lunacy... or sanity.

- Will